Bachelor 3 - Vince Perry

Hello Legacy Land!  We are down to our last three bachelors, George, Vince, and Robi. 

You have watched each of these men strive to become worthy suitors of our Heiress, Calliope Legalos.

You have voted for which Bachelor you think is most suitable - and now CalliopeLegalos will select one of the bottom two Bachelors to leave "The Heiress"    Calliope- have you made your selection?

I have.  But first I want to say what a great time I had with all of you.  I was beginning to doubt whether I would ever find someone I could have a serious relationship with - after all of the poetry and bowel problems and streaking and cross dressing I was ready to leave this show completely - but you guys have restored my faith that true love does exist and that we might find it together.  I would keep all of you if I could, but I have to let one of you go.

Vince, I have to say Goodbye.

Alright Legacy Land, you heard The Heiress.  Vince Perry, please join us on the couch and let's learn why Calliope just told you you're not worthy of her legacy.

Calliope, tell us why you eliminated Vince.  On your date you two had a great time.  He cooked for you, took you up to his apartment and you seemed to be sharing some quality one on one time on a mutually favorite hobby.  What about that didn't work for you?

Calliope:  My date with Vince was great - I really enjoyed him that night - and if it had stopped there, I'm not sure I would be sitting next to Vince right now.  Vince, you are so much fun, I laugh every time I'm with you - except for the last time I saw you.  I can't pretend it didn't happen Vince.

Vince:  What?  THAT?  You're still mad about that?  I told you it was nothing.

Calliope:  Umm, Vince, it is a big deal, to me, and if you don't understand that, I know we're not right for each other.

Calliope, Why don't you fill our viewers in Legacy Land in on what happened between you and Vince?

Calliope:  Ofcourse.  I had such a great time with Vince on our date that I couldn't wait to see him again.  I told the producers I wanted to invite him to HoHoHo's next Toga Party.  I thought it would be a lot of fun and we could maybe use it in a future episode.  The producers agreed and I invited Vince over.

When Vince arrived at the party I was really glad to see him.  I told him "Now there's some sheets I'd like to get between."  He laughed, and then he told me "Hey, listen, I brought Beverly with me, hope that's ok."  I looked over and saw a little red headed cheerleader chatting up my dad.  "Sure, I said, help yourself to the juice barrel."  At first I didn't think that much about it, people brought guests to toga parties all the time.

It really was no big deal until it became really obvious that Vince was spending all this time talking to Beverly.  My friend Conrad was there and he made the comment "hey, I thought those two had broken up."  I grabbed Conrad by the ear and dragged him into the bathroom.  "What do you mean broken up?"  I hissed.  Poor Conrad  "Cal, those two went out like all Freshman year, they were in my Methods of Math class, he was always all over that chick."  "AND??"  "And what?"   "And what broke them up?"  I realized I was still holding onto his ear and I let go.  "Sorry"  "It's ok.  Umm, people said that she met a streaker at a kicky bag tournament and ran off with him."

When I learned that Vince had brought an ex girlfriend to my Toga party all bets were off.  I went outside to confront him about it - and do you know where he was?

He was in MY hot tub letting that Rah-Rah-Rag give him a massage!

I was so hurt by that Vince.  I really liked you.  Why would you bring an ex girlfriend to a party where I wanted you to be my date?  You spent the whole night talking to her, and then you get in my hot tub and start rubbing each other in front of everyone.  How could you do that?  I thought you liked me.

Of course I like you Cal.  But we're not exactly exclusive, I mean, if you haven't noticed, you're publicly involved with two other guys besides me.  If we're in a real relationship then it's different, course.  But I hadn't talked to Bev in a long time and I thought it would be cool to hang out with her.  She just broke up with that streaker and needed someone to talk to.  I didn't know it was some big deal date for just the two of us - I thought it was, you know, a party.  It's not like I sucked her face or anything, it was just one kiss.

You kissed her?  Another girl?  At my party?

Well, uh yeah.  You kissed those other guys on national television, all that Rocksteady stuff.  What's the big deal.  I mean, I totally dig you, but what's good for the gander is good for the goose.  Ya know?

Vince, when you entered into this competition, you signed a contract agreeing to refrain from any other relationship until the final epsiode.  Your conduct at Miss Legalos' Toga party violates that contract.  Not only are you ineligible to continue in this competition, Miss Legalos has determined you to be unworthy of her legacy. 

Vince Perry, You will NOT marry The Heiress.  Goodbye.

Yeah, fine, whatever.  She liked those other two better anyway.

The Visitor
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